Posts by Neilcroy

    Neil Burns (Neilcroy)

    based on 1978 Bruce Springsteen song. sung later by 10,000 Maniacs (1983) and Cascada (2008)

    Chase Carver entered his condo exhausted from a long, boring reception sponsored by the
    UCLA Archeological Department. Of, course his date Lady Lara Croft was in heaven. At the
    very least, the food was decent.

    "Lara owes me big for this," the mercenary said to himself as entered the bedroom and peeled
    off his suit and tie, kicking off his shoes in the process, leaving only his boxers and socks.

    Suddenly, he felt an arm around his throat and his left arm forced upward into his back.

    "Said the spider to the fly," a familiar posh-accented alto tickled his ears, " 'Won't you step
    into my parlor'?"

    Before he could react, he found himself flying onto the bed and forced facing the ceiling.
    His arms were forced through the bars of the headpiece and his hands were handcuffed
    by his masked assailant who straddled him sporting a black skintight rubber footed catsuit,
    revealing the figure to be female. The woman took off her mask, revealing a rather smugly
    grinning Lara Croft.

    "Good evening, Chase." Lara purred.

    "Lara?!" Chase laughed. 'The nerve of this bitch!'

    "No, love. It's Angelina Jolie."

    "Right! I wish."

    "She wanted to come, you know, but--"

    "But, she's too busy getting screwed by Pitt and adopting her nine hundredth kid from
    some Third World country whose name I can't even pronounce."

    "A man can dream, right?" Lara lightly tapped the American's nose.

    "Yeah. Not that I'm complaining, darling, but there is this amazing new invention called
    the 'doorbell'. You press a button and a bell or buzzing lets the person inside that they
    have a visitor."

    "But, where's the fun in that?"

    "Another thing. Your kinky fetishes. Your little sex games are your business. What
    happens in the Manor stays in the Manor. However, I am not that into bondage."

    "Don't knock it until you tried it, Chase," the Tomb Raider purres as her hands began
    to rub up and down Chase's chest. "Alex seemed to enjoy it when I visited him."

    "Well, Al and I may be related on my mother's side, but we are two totally different

    "Of course, you are. You weren't enjoying yourself tonight, were you? I could tell."

    Lara began to gently stroke his hair.

    "Gee!" Chase snorted. "What was your first clue? I have never been so fucking bored in
    my life! I mean old farts yapping away about Ancient Persia and how they invented the
    first crapper. Who the hell cares!"

    "I'm sorry."

    Chase felt his face tingling as warm soft lips kissed his forehead. Lara raised her head
    and picked up the stereo remote from the bedside table and pressed the CD button.

    "Let me make it up to you."

    Suddenly, a minor piano key played and led into the Bruce Springsteen/Patty Smith
    1978 hit "Because The Night".

    Take me down, baby
    here as I am
    Hold me close
    try and understand

    The Tomb Raider started to grind against Chase as she lip synched the words, her
    fingerless gloved hands rubbing his chest up and down. Suddenly, her hands grabbed
    his blonde mop of hair as those warm lips pressed against his and gently, but firmly
    kissed his.

    Because the night
    belongs to lovers
    Because the night
    belongs to lust

    Chase's lips tingled at the sensation as he pressed, but Lara had already lifted hers
    off his.

    "No, love. Not until I say so."

    "Oh, you're a BITCH!" Chase groaned as said bitch continued to gyrate and tease
    his stiffening groin.

    "And you love it, Carver," Lara cooed sweetly.

    The Tomb Raider's fingers locked into his hair as her grinding continued to torture
    and tease him as her tongue slowly and cruelly licked and explored his ears and his
    cheeks. Lara cooed as she softly and gently began nibbling the mercenary's ear.

    "Mmmm, Chase. You taste so good. I could eat you all up!"

    "Lovely!" Chase retorted. "I'm not even human. Just a piece of meat to use and
    throw away like yesterday's garbage."

    "Welcome to my world, pet. Now you know how I feel."

    "So, would I be going out on a limb by assuming you finally forgive me for stealing
    those coins from you to pay my gambling debts, or are you still holding that over
    my head. I can only apologize for it so many times, darling."

    "Not yet," Lara replied as she kissed his forehead, then his nose. "However, I am
    considering it so it looks promising."

    "Well," Chase smiled. "Promising is good. In fact, it's very good."

    "Make me dinner and your chances will increase exponentially, Mr. Carver."

    "Are you serious?"

    Lara's finger glided up and down his cheek and jawline.

    "I am. In fact, make me dinner and I'll consider the whole bloody business
    completely forgotten."

    "Well, I can't promise five-star cuisine, although you obviously are used to
    eating less appetizing things to survive or 'peasant food' I ain't Gordon Ramsey or
    Guy Fieri, but I think I can whip up something at least half-edible."

    "I can hardly wait."

    "Does seven work for you or would you rather make it at eight?"

    "Seven works fine. Now, shut up and kiss me, Carver!"

    "Yes, ma'm! No need to tell me twice!"

    Lara's grinding continued as she slid her hands under Chase's head and grabbed the
    headframe. She then slid her legs out from under herself and lowered her body until
    she was lying on top of him. The dam broke as the song about hot passionate nights
    climaxed. Lara rammed her lips onto Chase's again and the two kissed fiercely and
    passionately. The American slid his hands out of the cuffs, thanks to a key taped
    to the side of the frame facing the wall, and grabbed Lara tightly as the steamy
    hot passion smoldered and burned into the night.

    THE END[/ffstory]

    ta-daa! hope we like. comments are welcome and showers and cigarettes are available :D

    Neil Burns (Neilcroy)

    Lara/Bryce (unrequited on B's part) based on Donovan's 1960's hit

    Good morning starshine
    The earth say hello

    A hand slowly burrowed out from the covered and struggled to find the alarm clock before shutting
    it off. Christian Bryce yawned and he stretched and spread his hands out to the side. He suddenly
    found himself touching something soft yet firm and very familiar. 'What the hell?'

    "Now that you satisfied your perverted fantasy of groping me," a posh alto greeted him, "please move
    your hand before I do it for you."

    Bryce immediately complied as he turned slowly to see his companion and, to his shock, lying on
    her side was Lara Croft! 'The bloody hell is SHE doing here!' It was not as if having the Tomb Raider
    in bed with him was a bad thing as he often fantasized about it. However, he had been friends with
    her since they were children and respected their friendship to try to force anything. She was
    also his employer, plus she could wipe the floor with him without breaking a sweat if he even
    thought of any funny business. The tech slowly raised the covers and saw Lara was wearing a
    white half-tank and pink pajama shorts. There was also a small tribal tattoo at the base of her

    "At least she isn't naked," Bryce mused as he thought of his employer's tendency of sleeping
    in the nude. He was relieved although there was a bit of disappointment.

    He carefully got out of bed and padded to the console to sit down. He folded his arms and
    placed his head on them as he wondered how Lara wound up in his bed. He also imagined
    the press having a field day. Not to mention Alister, Winston and even Zip giving him grief for
    her sleeping. Yes, he did have a crush on the Croft heiress since the age of ten which turned
    to love around when he was eighteen or so. Lara was flattered, but both knew the complications
    involved if the two wound in a relationship. In his musings, the tech failed to her the gentle
    patter of bare feet approaching. Slender, muscular arms draped across his shoulders and
    warm, soft lips gently kissed his cheek.

    "Good morning, Bryce," Lara smiled. "Did you sleep well?"

    "Yeah, thanks," he replied. "Sorry about groping you, but I wasn't even aware you were
    in bed with me."

    "That's quite all right. Just don't make it a habit."

    "No problem. Not that I'm complaining, but why were you in my bed especially since 'there
    are eighty-three bloody rooms in the Manor'?"

    Lara smiled at the rather poor imitation of her educated accent.

    "Needs work. To answer your question, I was out rather late at a fetish club and I didn't feel
    like dealing with Winston waiting up and lecturing me like a mother hen. Besides, your trailer
    was close and I figured, what the hell. See how the other half lives."

    "If you didn't go in the Manor, how are you wearing pajamas?"

    "They were in my overnight bag in the Aston."

    "I see."

    Lara walked around Bryce and sat on his lap stroking his hair, her expression one of sororial
    affection. Bryce was struggling to resist the temptation to scoop up his boss, throw her back
    on the bed and ravish her. She then cupped his head with her hands and pressed her forehead
    against his, her eyes looking directly into his.

    "I've always known, Bryce," Lara mused softly. "I know your feelings for me have always been
    more than just platonic and I am flattered. I do love you, but just as a friend and a brother.
    I am too complicated and have too much baggage for us to work."

    Suddenly, there was a knock on the door.

    "Master Bryce?" It was Winston. "Have you seen Lady Croft?"

    "I'm in here, Winston," Lara called, ignoring Bryce's shocked look.

    The door opened and the butler entered, a disapproving look on his features as he looked
    from Bryce to his surrogate daughter to the tech and back to the Tomb Raider again.

    "I didn't see you come in last night, Lady Croft. Therefore, I decided to come here and
    ask Master Bryce if he has seen you and, clearly he has."

    Bryce raised his hands.

    "Hey, Win. This ain't what it looks like. I'm just as surprised as you are. I didn't expect
    find her in my bed."

    "Not that you would object, of course." A dry eyebrow raised ceilingward.

    Lara got up and walked over to the overnight bag lying on the floor near the door and
    picked it up. She then pulled out a David Beckham ENGLAND soccer jersey and jeans.
    The two men turned their heads respectively as their employer began to change.

    "Like I told Bryce," she stated while dressing. "I came back late from clubbing and, quite
    frankly, was too tired to be bothered to go back to the Manor. The trailer was close and
    I figured Bryce wouldn't mind the company. That's it. Nothing scandalous."

    "Bullshit!" the tech snorted. "I can see the headlines: 'CROFT HEIRESS IN TRYST WITH HELP!"
    Details on page 7. I don't even want to think about Alister and Zip finding out. They would
    bug me to no end."

    "Well, we'll just have to be careful, don't we? Zip is visiting his family in Atlanta and won't
    be back until next week."

    "Oh, thank Christ! I didn't want to deal with him."

    "However," Winston put in, "Master Fletcher is just waking up and he might get a little
    suspicious if he saw the two of you together. It seems he also carries a torch for Lady

    "I have to say, Bryce," Lara smiled as she walked back over and stood over him, her
    fingers playing with his hair. "I would think this would be something to brag about to
    your mates at the pub."

    "Doing that would make you seem like a bloody trollop and you ain't that."

    "Despite her behavior at times?" the older man frowned at his charge.

    "Yeah. Me and her have known each other since we were in nappies practically. She's
    the sister I never had I respect her too much to drag her name through the mud. Of
    course, it's no secret how I feel about her. Would I like it if she returned them? Abso-
    fucking-lutely. Am I disappointed she doesn't? Definitely. However, I would be a bloody
    idiot to try and force the issue. I might wind up one of her practice targets and I like
    living, thank you very much."

    "Very wise of you, Master Bryce. You would definitely live longer."

    "Well," Lara interrupted as she stretch luxuriously, her fluid grace entrancing both
    men, "I must say it's quite refreshing to have a lie in until ten on ocassion, but my
    training would suffer if I made it a habit. Bryce, is SIMON ready to get his arse kicked?"

    "Oh, no, Croft," Bryce grinned. "I made some major improvements. The one getting
    their arse kicked is you."

    "Keep telling yourself that, Bryce. Maybe it will come true someday."

    She patted his head and walked to the door. Picking up the overnight bag, she
    pulled out a pair of tiger-skin thong panties and tossed it to the shocked tech.

    "Here," Lara grinned. "Now you may wank off to your hearts content."

    She winked and blew him a kiss before leaving. Winston simply shook his head
    and followed his employer and surrogate wondering whatever happened to her
    propriety and etiquette.

    THE END[/ffstory]

    Sorry it's been awhile. I've been busy with stuff. Enjoy and comments are welcome.

    Neil Burns (Neilcroy)

    [ffdesc]For those who like the rare Lara/Bryce ship. Enjoy and all comments and illustrations welcome.[/ffdesc]

    [ffstory]It was a glorious morning and the sun was a golden orange orb rising and smiling over the Surrey
    countryside and on a certain Manor. Bryce woke from a long, restful sleep and attempted to stretch,
    but found that his arms seemed to be held in a crucifix position. He also noticed that something seemed
    to be blocking his mouth. He looked in the mirrored wall in front of him and saw that he was only wearing
    a thong and that his arms and hands were strapped to a bar hanging horizontally. His ankles were strapped
    to a bar attached to the ground and a ball gag blocked his mouth from making any articulate sounds. 'What
    the bloody hell is going on Why am I only wearing a thong? What kind of perverse game is this!'

    "Good morning, Bryce." That familiar posh-accented alto. 'Lara! Dear GOD! Don't tell me she's into this!'

    Bryce turned and saw Lara leainging against the wall, one foot on it and her arms folded. She sported a skintight
    purple rubber dress that fell just inches below the pantyline and hugged every luscious curve. Long black rubber
    gloves sheathed her arms and hands and thigh-length black stiletto boots shod her feet. Her chestnut mane
    cascaded over her shoulders and down her back while a Russian officer's cap completed the ensemble and her lips
    were curved int a smile that was one of sadness mixed with canary-eating cat smugness.

    "I went to a fetish club last night," she breezed while getting off the wall and walking slowly to her helpless employee,
    her heels clicking against the floor, "where I got to punish some very naughty little boys. I seem to have another
    naughty little boy or two to discipline."

    She stopped right in front of Bryce, who struggled and tried to protest, but the ball gag made communicating rather
    difficult. She placed a gloved hand on his shoulder, giving it a not-quite-so-gentle squeeze.

    "I walked in to find the telly still on and it was on the Anime Channel. You were lying on the sofa, talking in your sleep.
    Saying stuff like something being 'a total clusterfuck'? and 'Thank God Lara doesn't know'. Thank God I don't know what,

    'Oh, SHIT! I am so screwed!' Bryce panicked as Lara walked to the wall and entered a code on the keypad. A portion of
    the wall opened and the tech's eyes bulged seeing a vast collection of whips, cat-o-nine tails and paddles. 'God, no! Please,
    Lara! Don't do it!' Bryce struggled and pleaded through the ball gag. The Tomb Raider merely smiled, pitying his plight but
    not willing to let the transgression slide. She picked out a white paddle enladen with rounded iron studs, then walked back
    while swinging it a bit like it was a tennis racket until she stood in front of Bryce, her sad yet predatory smile growing a few
    extra teeth.

    "Thank God I don't know what, Bryce?" the rubber-clad Raider queried while slowly gliding the edge of the paddle down
    Bryce's bare chest. "That you allowed Chase and Alex access to the tropy room so they could "loan out" my collection to
    various museums? That you were paid a handsome sum for your assistance?"

    She stopped at the family jewels, which she gently patted with her hand. She then slowly walked around behind Bryce and
    began gliding the side of the paddle down the back.

    "That the Dagger of Xian was auctioned off and that the new owner, thank God, only wants it for their collection and not
    for world domination? That the Dagger and the other artifacts taken were replaced by forgeries? Very high quality fakes,
    mind you, but still fakes, nonetheless."

    She stopped at the buttocks and gently patted them with the paddle before walking around to the tech's right and wrapping
    a friendly arm around his shoulders, stroking the back of his head.

    "Bryce, Bryce, Bryce," Lara cooed sympathetically. "Surely, you don't think I'm that stupid, do you? I've been in this game
    since I was sixteen and I'm thirty-four, thirty-five next Valentines Day. That's nineteen years, love. I think I should be able
    to tell a forgery, no matter how high quality, and the 'Real McCoy', as the Americans say. Thank God Alex and Chase, at least,
    had the moral deceny not to let the more dangerous artifacts out into the world."

    Lara walked back around to her tech's rear and again started gliding the paddle down his spine as he struggled helplessly and
    made muffled pleas for mercy.

    "I'm worried about you, Bryce." her soft voice and gentle tone belied the hurt, the sadness and the anger she felt inside her
    heart at the violation of her trust by her employee and her friend. "This is the second time you have allowed money to influence
    your actions to my detriment. I am afraid that Chase and Alex are starting to become a corrupt influence on you. That they are
    trying to turn you into a self-centered money-loving wanker like they are and I can't and I won't allow that so I must purge the
    greed from you. Please forgive me. I am only doing this for your own good."

    Suddenly, pain exploded up Bryce's spine as the paddle slammed against his nearly exposed backside, followed by several more
    such brutal assaults. His eyes began to mist up.

    "I am sorry, Bryce. This hurts me more than it hurts you."

    'Oh, that is BULLSHIT! Let me whack you in the arse a hundred times and then tell me that!' Lara attacked the reddening ass
    again and again and again, with increasing fury and intensity.

    "Damn you, Bryce!" she growled. "Why! You are not materialistic! Not money hungry! You don't give a DAMN about anything but
    your bloody trailer and your stupid arse games! Why! Why did you help them!"

    As the tech moaned helplessly and struggled futilely, he could have sworn he had heard a slight sob in his employer's voice

    "We have known each other since we were zygotes, Bryce! We are family! Families protect and look after each other! They trust
    each other and they are there for each other in good times and bad times! They don't betray them! They don't sell each other out
    just for a fucking payday! Is that it why, Bryce? For money? Am I not paying you enough?!"

    Suddenly, Lara stopped paddling Bryce, somewhat tired from the effort and walked to the keypad and punched in the combination
    to open the panel so she could put the paddle back. Wiping away tears that had formed during the punishment, Lara walked back
    with a pillow and blanket. She placed the pillow on the flloor right below Bryce and the blanket just off to the side. She removed the
    ball gag from Bryce's mouth, throwing it off to the side, then wrapped her arms around him, rubbing his back and stroking his hair.

    "What the bloody FUCK was that, Lara!" Bryce almost sobbed. "What the bloody CHRIST are you playing at!"

    Lara said nothing as she released Bryce from his bindings and lowered him into the pillow and knelt next to him, wrapping the
    blanket around him and supporting his weight.

    "Well," he smiled acidly. "I do hope you good a fucking good giggle out of this. You want to play Miss Bondage Queen, by all means.
    Knock yourself out. Just bloody keep me well out of it."

    "No, Bryce," the Tomb Raider almost whispered. "I didn't get a good giggle out of this. In fact, I took absolutely no pleasure in
    punishing you at all."

    "You'll forgive me if me and my arse think otherwise."

    Lara cupped her hands behind Bryce's head and planted a soft, yet firm kiss on his lips before pressing her forehead against
    his, looking him in the eye.

    "You are a good person, Bryce. You have this sweet innocence and you're like a six-year-old on Christmas whenever a new
    toy comes out. Nothing at all like Chase Carver and Alex West. I like them, but the problem is that they only see dollar signs
    and are only concerned with the next big payday. You ever see the cartoon where the character's eyes become dollar
    signs and you hear the ching of a cash register in the background."

    "And you think that I would become like them. Only concerned with money and sod all to everything else."

    "I do. Money isn't everything, Bryce. I grew up with it. Every wish and desire granted and, as a result, I was perhaps the
    biggest brat know to man. Of course, Father wanted me to marry a prominent groom to bring honor to the Croft name."

    "Until his death in Cambodia and the plane crash nixed those plans," Bryce replied. "Your point?"

    "Money didn't help me when I was in that plane crash. It didn't help me when Mother disappeared or when Daddy died
    in Cambodia. It didn't help me when I had to trudge eight hundred miles, eating whatever to survie, until I found shelter
    in that temple I found. Money isn't the be all end all. It pays the bills and provides temporary material comfort, but love
    and friendship is more important."

    "Says she who has very little of both," Bryce quipped.

    Lara removed her head from against his forehead and stroked his hair.

    "Tell you what," she purred. "Lunch and a day on the town. What do you say? My shout."

    "It'll take a LOT more than that to make me forget what just happened, Croft."

    At that moment, Zip entered holding a cellphone with a wide, knowing grin.

    "Sorry to interrupt your 'session, Mistress," he chuckled, "but a certain American wants to talk to you."

    "Oh? Who?"

    "Oh, his initials make the best root beer. A&W."\

    "Alex West." Lara smiled dryly.

    "Oi!" Bryce interjected. "Tell that Yank to fuck off."

    "Bryce!" the Tomb Raider lightly tapped his nose in mock affront. "Be nice. Zip. Could you please
    inform Mr. West that I will be busy all day and that I'll try to call him back another time, if ever."

    "You got it," Zip nodded, putting the cellphone to his ear. "Yo, Al! Boss Lady is tied up right now,"
    Bryce gave Zip the "British two-finger salute" at that. "Can she get you back? Right. Okay." Zip
    hung up.


    "Well, Al will holla back another time and, Bryce? He says right back at ya. Have fun, kids. Don't do anything I
    wouldn't do. Or would."

    He left, not saying another word as Lara's mouth curved into a predatory smile as she kissed Bryce's cheek.

    "Well. Where were we?"

    THE END[/ffstory]

    ta-daa. hope we like. :sun: enjoy and please comment. take care. ;-)


    as Ron Weasley would say: "Bloody brilliant!" this is very well done. I can see Alister writing this down and the words
    echoing in his mind. by all means, finish this and submit it to Ostercy's site. I know the judges would love it. :grins

    by Neil Burns (Neilcroy)


    [ffstory]Lara sat hidden in the tree overlooking the estate as she watched the guests in casual and swimwear enjoy food and drink and music. A gray full OCEAN PACIFIC wetsuit with blue piping down the side encased her voluptous, athletic figure as her bare feet dangled from the branch. As she watched the activities, betrayal and anger toward a certain American treasure hunter burned her insides.


    "Who's fucking brilliant idea was this!" Chase demanded as both Tomb Raiders ran through the temple, barely avoiding deathtraps and being persued by undead Mayans with blowguns.
    "I don't know," Lara sneered. "Blonde. Yank. Think he's bloody Indiana Jones. Know him?"
    "You like fucking with the Grim Reaper, don'tcha, Red? Let me tell you. Tempt him enough and he will come for you."
    "I thought he came for me when Von Croy left me in Egypt."
    "I heard about that. That was cold."
    "Keep running! We're almost there!"
    "Tell you what. Let's split up. Confuse them."


    "Of course," Lara snarled from her perch. "I get chased to a section that is all deathtraps only to find a bloody makeup room while that bloody Yank makes off with the treasure! In fact, he got it the day before he came to the bloody Manor!"
    It turned out that Chase had gone on a couple of very successful, high-paying digs which resulted in his way-more-than comfortable living. Suddenly, the DJ stopped the music.
    "And now," he announced. "Would you please welcome our host. A man who needs no introduction. A legend among archeologists and Tomb Raiders alike. A man with
    nerves and balls of steel. A heart of a lion. The brain that Albert Einstein would envy--"
    "Oh, my bloody God," Lara snorted. "Someone is full of himself."
    "The man who can teach Indiana Jones and our own Lady Lara Croft herself, whom we all know and love, a few pointers about how to succeed--"
    "How to screw over and betray your colleague you mean, love."
    "The man. The myth. The Sex God Himself. CHASE CARVER!"
    Suddenly, the theme to GOLDFINGER blared out as Chase Carver strutted into view clad in a white tuxedo with a black shirt and mirrored sunglasses. A grin reeking of cheesiness curved his lips as he stopped and waited for a blonde with tartish makeup and a black too-tight and too-short cocktail dress strolled up and took his arm. They both then regally deigned to meet the guests.
    "Chase Carver!" the vocalist sang with a Shirley Bassey warble, "he's the man. The man with the Midas touch. The magic touch. Oh, Chase Carver."
    The entrance, plus Chase dancing horribly out-of-rhythm to Flo Rida's "Sugar" and "Poker Face" by Lady GaGa, caused Lara to immediately climb down off the tree so
    she could safely collapse to the ground and nearly urinate herself laughing. After many mirth-filled minutes, the Raider stopped and took some cleansing breaths.
    "Well," she chuckled. "Given the week I had, I needed a bloody good laugh. Thank you, Mr. Carver."
    Having recovered sufficiently, Lara peeked over the shrubbery.
    "Thank you, folks," Chase grinned. "I regret that 'personal business' must occupy my time for a while."
    The crowed laughed and cheered as the blonde kissed the treasure hunter's cheek.
    'That's very bad form, Mr. Carver,' Lara thought with disapproval. 'A good host or hostess always accomodates their guests.'
    "But, please. Enjoy yourselves. The party's going all night, so have fun and I will see you all later."
    As the couple went inside for their "personal business", Lara stole across the grounds, unnoticed by the partygoers until she stopped by the refreshments
    table. Not having had lunch, she grabbed a plate and put a hamburger as well as a piece of barbecue chicked and four ribs on it and took a diet coke. 'I would
    not make a steady diet of this, but it's good in a pinch'. She then stole inside the houst and perched herself on the kitchen countertop to enjoy her repast.
    Suddenly, the DJ entered.
    "Well, hey there, darling," he grinned. "I never saw you here before."
    "Hey, sugar," Lara replied in a soft, Southern accent. "I'm a friend of Chase's. I live down the street aways. I heard he was having a party and decided to
    drop in."
    "I see. Well, he and Darlene are upstairs in his room doing whatever. You want me to tell him you're here?"
    "No need, hon. I'll just pop up and say hi myself."
    "Okay. Just go upstairs and take a left. His bedroom is straight down the hall Darlene's is straight down the hall in the opposite direction."
    "Thanks, honey." Lara kissed his forehead. "Appreciate it."
    The DJ nodded and left. Lara finished her lunch and headed upstairs where she walked down the hall to Darlene's bedroom, through the substantial walk-in closet and into
    the bathroom on the other side where she peeled off her wetsuit and bikini, dumping them into the tube before entering the walk-in shower. As the hot water cleansed
    and relaxed the Raider, she comtemplated prancing into his room stark naked just to see his face as he would try to explain her to Darlene.
    "No," Lara smiled to herself. "He'd have a heart attack. Besides, I'm not THAT much of a bitch."
    She dried herself off and re-entered the closet to examine the clothing before she decided on a gray midriff-baring top and snug-fitting jeans. She put on her gloves
    and gunbelt before padding barefoot down the hall to Chase's room. Lara peeked in and saw an underwear-clad Darlene kneeling on Chase, who lay face down on the
    bed while she massaged him.
    "I'm sorry, love. This simply will not do at all."
    The Raider snuck in and quietly incapacitated the blonde with a Marine sleeperhold, gently removing her from the bed and lay her on the floor. She then knelt on Chase's
    back and began massaging. Of course, the American had his iPod on, so he did not notice anything except the stronger, more confident touch.
    "Darlene," Chase smirked. "You've been holding out on me. You do know how to do a massage."
    Lara merely smiled as she thought of her own massuse Gisel who gave her lessons.
    Chase removed his iPod and turned his head slightly.
    "You know, I was thinking of 'Lady' Lara Croft," he said with a rather cynical tone to the title. "She is a real pain in the ass sometimes."
    The Raider said nothing, but looked forward to hearing Chase's explanation.
    "First off, the bitch takes all the high-paying digs, leaving the rest of us with shit. Even worse, she donates them without cashing in. That's fine for her since she's
    got Daddy's money to play with so she can fuck around as she pleases. Some of us lowly dregs actually have to work for a living."
    The Raider narrowed her eyes at the "Daddy's money" comment, but she did not realize that her activities were affecting others.
    "She has this fucking high-and-might attitude and judges people on everything. Yes, I gambled with three hundred thousand of her money and had to use those
    coins to pay for it. I had no choice in the matter and I regret it every single day since it happened. Yet, she still holds it over me. It's like Alex with the prayer
    wheels. We're human. We make mistakes, yet she acts like Little Miss Perfect."
    'Those aren't simple mistakes, Chase," Lara thought, glaring at the back of Chase's head. 'Those were pieces of my soul you and Alex stole from me.'
    "Okay. Maybe we're not exactly angels. Me and Al do have standars, you know. Admittedly they aren't that high."
    'No they aren't.' Lara thought dryly.
    "At least me and Al ain't Marines who would desert their command and risk millions of lives just to make money on something that could wipe out the
    human population. Just the fact, Croft thinks me and Al are in th e same league with this Sheridan or whoever he is offends me."
    That stung the Raider. What stung more was that the American was correct. Yes, Alex and Chase betrayed her numerous times, but they would have
    never risked the world's extinction just for profit.
    "The thing is that she is the most annoying, most aggravating, most frustrating, most maddening, most delightful, most amazing woman that I ever
    had the pleasure of knowing. She's witty, sarcastic, brilliant, funny. A joy and a pain in the ass to be with. Despite the times I have played her for a
    sucker and screw her, the truth is I love her."
    Lara smiled. Chase always knew how to touch her soul the right way.
    "Of course, she is now seeing this holy man with a tricked out frisbee that slices people in half with just a thought. I ain't going to mess with that. If she
    is happy with him, good for him. If and when she gets tired of him, Alex and I are available. Otherwise, not all men are bastards. Especially American men. I do love
    her and I would do anything to make it up to her. I just wish that I could tell her in person.
    "You just did, love," Lara's voice purred into his ear.
    "Lara?!" Chase rose and turned to face the Tomb Raider, adjusting himeself so she was kneeling on his chest, facing him. She glanced briefly at his boxers before
    leaning forward smiling, arms folded on his chest.
    "Well," Chase mused. "This is an unexpected pleasure. What are you doing here and where is Darlene?"
    "Well," Lara smiled, stroking her rival's hair. "I was in the neighborhood and I decided to drop in and say hello. As for your ladyfriend, she is having a lie in."
    "I see." Chase raised an arm and stroked the Raider's cheek. She did not refuse, but an arched eyebrow was sole indication that she did not totally approve the gesture. "I missed you, Red."
    "It's only been a few months, Chase. I'm still furlous about Chile. Going through a temple full of deathtraps only to find a makeup room?"
    "Chile. Yes."
    "That's exactly what I am talking about. I'm flattered you think so highly of me, but you apologize, only to do the same shit over and over again. It's like a bloody
    broken record."
    "Guilty as charged."
    "However, you are right. I often forget that not everyone is as fortunate as I am, nor did I realize that my passion affects others."
    "Nobody's saying give up your passion, darling. Just leave some high-paying digs for the rest of us mere mortals."
    "I'll try, but some things are not meant to be found."
    "Like Pandora's Box?"
    "Yes, and I suppose I often compare you and Alex to Terry Sheridan. For that I am truly sorry. You two do have standards, extremely low as they are."
    "Not everyone is perfect, O Goddess of the Virtues," Chase grinned as he started playing with Lara's loose chestnut tresses.
    "Yes, well, I resent the 'Daddy's money' comment."
    "That was a low shot. Sorry."
    "What am I going to do with you, Chase? You are like Alex. You both talk a good game. You both fuck up, say you're sorry and promise to change, yet you do
    the same thing over and over. You're like bloody leopards. You don't change your spots. It's maddening. And please don't say that I have to let go at some point and that you'll do anything to make up for all your betrayals. This my heart and my soul you two steal from every time. Asking you two to change your ways is like asking me to become a bloody nun. It's simply not in my nature."
    "Pity," Chase smirked. "You'd make one sexy nun, assuming there is a convent tolerant and stupid enough to take you in."
    "Touche," Lara laughed, kissing the American's forehead.
    "How's Frisbee Boy?"
    "Fine," Lara replied, catching Chase's hand as it lowered toward her denim-clad bottom. "Cheeks and hair are acceptable. My tits and arse are off limits."
    "How about--" The American's eyes lowered to Lara's waistline. She grabbed his chin and raised it to face her.
    "THAT is definitely off limits."
    "Pity." A casual shrug. "Oh, well. A man can dream, can't he?"
    The Raider rolled her eyes in exasperation as Chase resumed playing with her chestnut mane.
    "First off, it's not a frisbee. It's a glaive."
    "Like in that piece of crap film KRULL?" Chase snorted.
    "Yeah. Also, the Lux Veritas is not a religious order. They were a secret brotherhood that fought black magic and alchemy."
    "Kurtis is the only Lux Veritas left. The others are dead."
    A smile crossed the treasure hunter's face as a thought crossed his mind.
    "You know, the other day Alex said that you paid him a visit."
    "Yes. It was a nice chat," Lara smiled. "I had a few things to get off my chest, no jokes please. A good chance to clear things up."
    "You're welcome to stick around. Plenty of food and booze," Chase offered.
    "I'm sure the folks will be honored to meet you."
    "Unfortunately, I have to fly to Japan in a few hours to attend a seminar. Besides, I already ate."
    "Sounds like a party."
    "You know that 'entrance' was the funniest thing I have ever seen in my bloody life. And Gene Kelley has nothing to worry about. Thank you for
    giving me a bloody good laugh."
    "I resent that," Chase mock-pouted. "I worked hard on that entrance."
    "Mr. Carver, if you're James Bond, I'm bloody Mother Theresa."
    "Nice to meet you , Your Holiness."
    "Good bye, Chase!" Lara kissed the American's cheek before getting off.
    "By the way, tell Darlene that she is welcome to the wetsuit and bikini in I left in her tub. I figure it's a fair trade for the clothes she let me
    borrow. Cheers."
    "Cheers. Just remember, Red. You get tired of Frisbee Boy, I'm available."
    Lara replied by simply giving him a British sod off gesture and left. She headed down the stairs and exited through the front door, unnoticed by
    the party guests.
    "God bless Lara Croft," Chase chuckled as he picked up Darlene and placed her on the bed. He covered her with a blanket before he left to join the
    other party guests. [/ffstory]


    ta-daa. another one in the books. please comment. I'm curious how people here like my tales. also, if there are any talented artists here, I'd be
    honored if you could illustrate my tales. peace. :grins


    true. of course, I imagine Wikipedia's info is based on if Lara was a real person and if the timeline of the games
    was in "real life time". but as Lara is 30 or so (thus her birthdate is 1978, meaning Amanda was born sometime
    in 1980), that works for me just fine. I find it interesting that Larson is only a year older than Lara. (I thought
    he was maybe early-mid 40s). what surprises me the most is that von Croy was only about 60 when he died in
    AOD. I thought he was much older. at least 70s or so.

    hey Cat,

    I just was wondering if the site or game guide gave a specific date for Amanda's birthday. would you happen to know?
    just wondering.


    TANKOBON vols. 2-5. very entertaining.

    hey, Cat, :wave2:

    according to Wikipedia, she is born February 14, 1968. that makes her proper age 41. so Amanda was born
    sometime in 1970, so that makes her my age, 39. of course, 41 isn't really old anyway. but Eric say's Lara is
    eternally 30 in the game, fine. that's the beauty of fantasy. you can be whatever age the creator(s) decide
    for you. (I find it ironic Lara is born on Valentine's Day, yet her love life totally sucks [hehe] :grins )

    hey all,

    how are we? I was thinking. (yes, it can be hazardous [hehe] ) anyway, Lara's about 30, 35 tops.
    how old would we say Amanda is? I'm guessing eithe the same or maybe a couple of years younger.
    any thoughts? :sun:

    hey, :wave2:

    I saw the cutscenes on YOUTUBE yesterday and imagine my surprise. "Oh, my God! It speaks!" Dopplelizer
    sounds like a tape recorder breaking down in that low slow voice, but she speaks. interesting. I asked why
    didn't she on another forum and a few folks there say that to have her speak would ruin it, but I think it
    actually sounds cool. (by the way, Cat. I got "Dopplelizer" from someone's signature on TOMBRAIDERFORUMS
    knowing you didn't like "Dopplehoe".:grins) anyway, should be a fun game and I can imagine the fiction with this.

    hey O, :wave2:

    "better than having to meet Allison"? how about meeting Angelina or Rhona? :grins ;-) anyway, one entry per
    person sounds fair. that way, everyone is on the same playing field. if that's the case, I'll stay with TRUTH
    OR DARE. it's a fun story and I have a good feeling about it. I can submit one of my other stories for the
    next contest you have in the future. so, TOD is my entry and good luck to everyone. :grins

    hey, :wave2:

    I entered. I submitted TRUTH OR DARE and I might submit one of my others. he wasn't sure of the prize.
    well, I was thinking maybe the winner gets a meet and greet with Allison Carrol and/or Keeley Hawes. or
    at least an autographed photograph of Allison and a free copy of TOMB RAIDER COMPENDIUM.
    (Speaking of TOD, how about some more comments? I'm sure Redhell is not the only one who read it
    Lady Cat? comment? I promise I'll stop using "Dopplehoe". ;-) :grins cool? so, comments on my two stories
    please, folks.) and good luck to everyone in the contest. may the best writer win. :grins


    by Neil Burns (Neilcroy)

    rated PG/PG-13? some langauge and adult references


    Hillary Winston heard the Lady of the Manor bellow as he headed toward the stairwell carrying a tray with
    tea and scones. Suddenly, computer geek/technical wizard Christian Bryce flew down the stairs, holding
    his digital camera and wearing a guilty expression on his face. He stopped long enough to take a scone
    before running out the back. Immediately afterward, a very wet and furious Lara Croft stormed down
    the stairs, wrapped in only a towel.

    "Christian Bryce!" she growled. "You are a bloody DEAD MAN when I get my hands on you!"

    "A little overdressed this morning, My Lady?" Winston asked with a bland smile.

    "No, Hilly," Lara returned the butler's smile. "Mr. Bryce thought it would be terribly amusing to take my
    photograph as I was coiming out of the shower."

    "Ah, the mystery is solved. I just saw Master Bryce now. He took a scone before running out the back
    door, I believe the Americans use the expression 'like a bat out of Hell'?"

    "Well, he is going to EAT that bloody camera! For the life of me I can't understand why Bryce would do
    something like this. Kurtis or Alex, I can see doing this. Terry Sheridan is a definite yes. Larson? There
    is a no-brainer if ever there was one. Bryce? No. I know he always had a crush on me, but he was also
    always very discrete."

    "I am certain there is a logical explanation, Lady Croft."

    "Good." Lara took a scone and began eating it while sipping her tea. "He can explain before I make him
    suffer a long, slow and painful death."

    As the Raider took another scone, delightful fanatasies about killing a certain tech in the most painful,
    most humiliating ways possible. Suddenly, a cruel smile curved her full lips.

    "Of course," she purred, "he could be my human target."

    Lara referred to the practice of Winston wearing a tea tray under a metal chest protector while she shot
    rubber bullets or paintballs to keep up her marksmanship.

    "Really?" Winston's eyes brightened before he feigned a cough. "I mean that is very disappointing, but I
    am certain that I can summon the strength to get over this." the butler's tone was anything but

    "Well,I feel the need to shoot something," Lara mused, giving Winston a playful wink, "but since Bryce
    isn't here, have Zip set up SIMON. I will be down in about ten or fifteen minutes."

    "Yes, Lady Croft," Winston smiled as Lara left with her scone and tea to go upstairs. "Right away."

    Twenty minutes or so later, clad in a black sport bra and tight-fitting black exercise tights with blue
    piping down the sides, a barefoot Lara scampered from pillar to statue to saracophagus, firing at SIMON
    while ducking the hail of bullets assaulting and barely missing her, courtesy of Bryce giving the robot new
    weapons to even the playing field. Lara managed to dive behind a large Bast statue as yet another round
    of bullets just missed her.

    "It would seem," Winston observed into Lara's headset, "that Master Bryce has 'stepped it up' a bit?"

    "No shit, Sherlock," Zip snorted. "You alive, Lara?"

    "Yes I am, Zip," Lara replied. "Thank you for asking. Winston is right. I wanted a challenge and, so far,
    Bryce is delivering the goods."

    "Well, he did say that he installed a few upgrades while you and West were farting around in Thailand.
    You should be getting those upgrades soon."

    Suddenly, SIMON stopped firing and immediately shut itself down.

    "All right, Mr. Bryce," the Tomb Raider smirked, preparing herself for whatever came next. "Let's see what--"
    Her train of thought was interrupted by the sudden appearance of four figures. Lara gasped in shock seeing
    that they were HER! From the fingerless gloves to the gunbelt carrying twin fifty-caliber pistols to the
    signature French plait, they were identical to Lara Croft down to every detail. At first glance, they appeared
    to be naked, but a closer look revealed that they wore full fleshtone bodysuits that were footless and
    skintight to the point of being almost painted on.

    "Hello," Zip mused. "That's unexpected."

    "It would seem Master Bryce has quite the fascination with you, Lady Croft," Winston stated bemusedly.

    "You think?" Lara retorted.

    Suddenly, the "Laras" opened fire, spraying the Tomb Raider's hiding place with bullets as Lara barely got
    out of there and sprinted for another place to hide, firing at the persuing clones. She flopped gracelessly
    behind a large saracophagus, waiting for the quartet to come towards her. She grabbed the first clone to
    come close enough and engaged her in brutal hand-to-hand combat. Lara stood triumphant over the four
    clones, but her joy was short-lived as they all got up and stood with their hands on their hips, arms akimbo,
    their lips curled into cruel smiles. Suddenly, the Tomb Raider's eyes widened as gun barrels popped out of
    the clones' nipples. Lara barely got away before the barrels began firing at the fleeing Raider.

    "Wow," Zip stated amused.

    "Oh, my," Winston observed.

    "One word about guns and breasts," Lara growled from behind the Anubis statue that served as her present
    cover, "and I wil rip your tongues out."

    "I would not dream of it, Lady Croft."

    "My lips are sealed, Boss Lady," Zip smirked.

    "Mr. Bryce and I are going to have a very long talk when he comes back from wherever it is he is hiding,"
    Lara hissed.

    "I hate to be in his shoes."

    "They seemed to have stopped." Lara decided to risk a peek. "Oh, for the love of GOD!"

    The Lara clones' nether regions opened and missiles poked out. In an instant, Anubis was oblierated, but
    Lara miraculously escaped before the clones homed in on her. The cat-and-mouse game with the missiles
    continued for another ten minutes. Lara found herself in one of the saracophagi, hiding and catching her
    breath as the clones walked by searching for her.

    "Crotch rockets!" Lara snarled. "Oh, very amusing, Bryce. Real bloody FUCKING HILARIOUS! How would you
    like me to shove one of those rockets up your bloody PERVERTED ARSE!"

    "Umm. Is that what's known as 'shooting one's load'?" Zip asked innocently.

    "Master Zip!" Winston chided. "That was indeed VERY poor taste!"

    "Zip?" Lara smiled with sweet poison. "How would you like a 'load' shoved down your throat? Then do me
    a favor and shut up."

    "Got it."

    Lara eased her way out of the saracophagus and made it halfway to the entrance when a sudden rain of
    bullets and missiles barely missed her and, again, she found herself having to find cover. Lara ducked
    behind another statue as she unleashed a very long and foul stream of expletives, fantasizing about
    eviscerating a certain tech slowly and VERY painfully. She could hear Winston gasp in shock.

    "Lara Amelia Croft!" the butler admonished. "A lady does NOT use such appalling gutter language!"

    "Yeah, Lara!" Zip laughed.

    "Yes, Winston," Lara retorted, "but who says that I am a lady? Zip? Please tell me you have some
    good news."

    "Matter of fact," the American tech replied, "I have good news and bad news. The good news is that
    your clones are not Natla Bitch's dopplehoes. They are only robots that can be deactivated by switches
    located at the base of their spines."

    "That is good news. What's the bad news?"

    "Well, the only way to shut them off is doing it manually."

    "Manually. As in 'get up close and personal manually'?"

    "Well, I suppose there is a remote, but I ain't got no clue where B-man keeps it."

    "Did I mention that I am going to murder Bryce?"

    "You may have mentioned it a time or two or three, Lady Croft," Winston stated.

    "Or a dozen or so," Zip chimed in.

    "Or fifty or one hundred."

    "Give or take."

    "Very funny."

    A couple of long hours later, a heavily bruised and dirty, but triumphant Tomb Raider walked out of the
    simulation room and nearly collapsed. Winston was immediately at her side with towel and bottled water
    while Zip started to massage Lara's shoulders. Lara purred in contentment.

    "Thank you, boys," the Raider smiled warmly.

    "Yeah, Lara!" Zip cheered as his fingers released the knots in the Raider's shoulders. "Way to kick some
    robotic boo-taay! That was your most kickass performance yet!"

    "Thank you. I suppose I owe Bryce a raise for this." Winston cought delicately.

    "If you are finished, please pardon the expression, 'playing with yourself'? I have been watching the
    screen and there is something that may be of considerable interest to you."

    Lara sat in front of the console and gasped at what she found. The screen showed half a dozen men
    sitting around a fireplace in an expensively decorated den, drinking bourbon and smoking cigars.
    Lara recognized five of them as Bryce, her American ex-lovers Kurtis Trent and Alex West, ex-Royal
    Marine-turned mercenary Terry Sheridan, and Natla's lackey Conrad Larson. The sixth unknown man
    was a handsome thirtysomething who oozed charme and confidence. The men were playing Truth or
    Dare and it was Bryce's turn.

    "Okay, Mr. Bryce," the man, identified as J.R. Hutton IV, drawled as he patted the tech's back, "besides
    me, you are the only one who has not bedded Lady Croft. Correct?"

    Bryce spat out his drink in shock. Lara felt her eyes narrow.

    "Well, what we want to know is have you ever slept with Croft or fantasized about it?"

    "I'm sorry, WHAT was that?!" He stared at the other men in disbelief.

    "Have you ever slept with Croft," Sheridan smiled. "We're all blokes here, mate. No worries."

    "I think I'll take the dare."

    "You sure?" Alex smirked in mock pity.


    "Okay," Hutton drawled smugly. "Your dare is to photograph Lady Croft in her birthday suit."

    "Her WHAT?!" Bryce could not believe what he heard.

    "Lara starkers, as you Brits say." The Texan chuckled dryly.

    "You're barking! The lot of you! Lara will have my bloody BALLS for lunch!"

    "Come on, B-man," Kurtis smiled. "You've seen Lara naked before. What's the big deal?"

    "The big deal, Trent," Bryce retorted, "is that first of all, I had no idea that you were with her
    when I accidentally entered her room. Secondly, I like living, thank you."

    Hutton picked up a checkbook from the desk in the corner and wrote in it. He then walked over
    to Bryce and placed it in the tech's hands. Bryce looked at it and almost dropped it in shock.

    "T-t-t-ten million dollars?" he croaked in disbelief.

    "DAMN!" Zip whistled.

    "That is what?" Hutton asked Sheridan, "about five or six million pounds?"

    "GIve or take a few shillings," the mercenary grinned.

    "Just think, Bryce," Kurtis patted the tech on the back. "Think of all the toys you can buy. Think
    of the upgrades you can give SIMON. Make Lara REALLY work for her victory."

    Bryce just stood there as the figure sunk in and guilt began gnawing away at his insides. He sighed
    as he closed his eyes in silent prayer before opening them again.

    "I am so sorry, Lara," he almost whispered. "I'll do it."

    "Atta boy!" Larson crowed, slapping the tech's back. "Make sure you get us copies."

    The screen then went blank as Lara sat there in shock, taking in what she saw.

    "It would seem Master Bryce's actions were not of his own accord, wouldn't you say, Lady Croft?"
    Winston said, placing a paternal hand on Lara's shoulder.

    "No, I wouldn't," Lara replied sharply. "I would say Bryce was, as the Americans say, 'railroaded'
    into doing this stupid bet. He was bribed, which is even more disappointing."

    "I don't know," Zip smiled. "If someone told me to take a nude picture of you, I'd do it for free."

    He was answered with a chilly raised eyebrow.

    "Right. Shutting up now."

    "So, this would qualify as 'mitigating circumstances'?" Winston queried.

    "No. Bryce won't be seriously punished, but he is not getting away with this."

    "Just don't be too hard on him. Okay, Lara?" Zip asked.

    Lara smiled as she stood and placed her fingerless-gloved hands on her boys' cheeks, patting them
    before going upstairs for a shower. Later that night, the front door to the Manor opened and Bryce
    snuck in, easing the door closed. He carried a white teddy bear holding a red heart saying I'M SORRY
    and a boquet of a dozen Sterling roses. Bryce figured he would sneak into Lara's room while she slept
    and leave them. He got halfway to the stairs when--

    "Good evening, Bryce." That familiar posh accent tickled his ears.

    "Oh, SHIT!" he groaned. 'I am SO dead.'

    "You can say that again. Come here, Bryce."

    Bryce turned to the voice and saw Lara sitting on one of the large oversized sofas by the fireplace. She
    was wearing a black tanktop and black silk pajamas under a green ornately decorated robe and her feet
    were bare. She was reading PLUTARCH'S LIVES while smoking a Montechristo cigar. Bryce walked over
    and stood in front of Lara, praying for a quick death.

    "We missed you this morning," the Raider said without preamble, not looking up from her book.

    "Yeah," the tech replied. "I was busy all day with errands."

    "I see. Are those for me?" Lara placed her book on the sofa beside her.

    Bryce handed her the teddy bear which she immediately flung into the fireplace without even sparing
    it a glance. She took the roses and looked at them and Bryce, eyebrow raised as she wondered how
    he could afford such an expensive present. She then remembered the check.

    "Sterling?" A trace of amusement could be heard in her voice.

    "Well, I did fuck up this morning and I wanted to make up for it."

    "I see. Sit down, please."

    Bryce immediately complied and sat down across from the Raider, who leaned back and took a few
    puffs of her cigar and exhaling as she placed it in the ashtray on the table beside her. She then leaned
    back and folded her arms, scrutinizing the man sitting across the room.

    "You have exactly one minute to explain why I should not rip out your lungs and feed them to you for
    that stunt this morning."

    "Well," Bryce replied. "I was at this American bloke's flat in London. We were playing Truth or Dare and
    it was my turn."

    "Yes," Lara cut in and stood up, walking over to where Bryce sat. "And your dare was to photgraph me
    naked, which is why you stood outside the shower waiting for me."

    "I meant no harm, Lara."


    "Yeah, the other blokes speak of you like you're some bloody trollop. Yes, I admit that I have a crush
    on you and I had one since I started working for you five years ago. Of course, I'm just some poor
    blighter from Lancashire and you're practically bloody royalty. Your family goes back what? About nine
    or so generations? What chance would I have? Anyway, I would never act on my crush because you would
    have my balls for breakfast for one. Two, you're my boss and that means you're the one who, as the
    Yanks say, 'sign my checks'. Three, you are my friend."

    Lara raised an eyebrow as she felt her upper lip curl upward.

    "Yes, my friend," Bryce smiled more confidently. "I know that beneath that hard cynical shell beat s the
    heart of a loving, gentle, warm, compassionate soul. You're witty, you're smart, you have a shoulder
    for one to cry one, a sympathetic ear to bend, a word of encouragement to raise a bloke's spirits."

    Lara's mouth now formed a full smile as she listened to Bryce plead his case and indulge in some
    shameless ass-kissing.

    "In short, you're the sister I never had and the friend that I am happy to be associated with. I know
    I am a pain in the arse at times, but what I did was inexcusable. I let my greed and my hormones get
    the best of me. I never meant to hurt you, Lara, and I am truly and deeply sorry. I will hand in my
    resignation tommorrow before you kill me."

    Lara stood there for a moment before placing two fingers under the tech's chin, rasing them so he
    faced her. She then placed a hand on his cheek.

    "I don't suppose you practiced all day saying that?" she queried softly. "Never mind. That was very
    well thought out and very well said." Lara patted the tech's cheek. "I know you didn't mean to hurt
    me, Bryce, but you did. That was a violation of my privacy and my personal space. You let yourself
    be coerced into doing something you knew was wrong. You were bribed, which is even more

    Bryce hung his head, but again, Lara raised it with two fingers placed under his chin. She then
    stroked it with a gentle smile on her lovely features.

    "However, you did 'man up', as the Americans say, and apologize. For that, I thank you. I do
    forgive you, but you still must be punished. Starting tommorrow, you will be my human target
    for the next four months."

    Bryce groaned loudly.

    "That's just for starters. I'll think of something. In the meantime, get some sleep and we'll have
    a long talk tommorrow about some of your 'improvements'.

    "The 'Larabots'." Bryce grumbled.

    "Them. Meanwhile, well done on the program otherwise. It was quite the challenge."

    "Right. The original picture is on the console in my trailer."

    "Thank you.I will deal with Kurtis and the others in the morning."

    Lara kissed Bryce's cheek and patted it before heading upstairs to bed. Bryce walked over to the
    computer area where Winston and Zip were watching. The American tech raised his fist.

    "My man," he crowed. "That was slick!"

    "Indeed," the butler chuckled. "Well played indeed."

    "Obviously not well enough," Bryce groused. "I have to be Human Target Boy for the next four months."

    Winston patted the tech on the back with mock sympathy.

    "There, there. It only hurts the first dozen times or so. You get used to it after a while."

    "Better you than me, man," Zip grinned. "Night, all."


    Da-daa! Done! I got the sport bra/tights combo from the beginning of TRA where Lara is working out
    in the Manor Gaming Room. also, anyone know what $10,000,000 (US) is in pounds? anyway, enjoy and
    PLEASE let's hear from you. peace out.

    by Neil Burns (Neilcroy)

    PG/T (Rish?)

    It was a warm rainy night and Alex West was awakened by a loud crash of thunder. As he stirred,
    he realized that he was immoblized and the he could no talk. As he struggled to move, the light
    turned on. Turning to the mirror, he was shocked to find the covers were removed, revealing
    that he was wearing MIAMI UNIVERSITY boxers, and that he was tied to the bed and tape-
    gagged. A low throaty laugh caught his attention and standing by the lighswitch, her athletic,
    voluptous body poured into a skintight black rubber footed catsuit, features set in an extremely
    smug grin of a canary-eating cat was one Lady Lara Croft.

    "Oh, Mr. West!" she cooed in a perfect Southern accent. "I am just your biggest fan! Would y'all
    be a dear and sign this lovely steaming pile of bullshit you wrote?"

    As Alex's indignant protests were muffled by the duct tape, the Tomb Raider mockingly placed
    one finger on her lip as if thinking.

    "Oh, I almost forgot." her voice resumed its familiar posh Buckhamshire accent. "I am using the
    pages to line my new cat's litterbox. The only appropriate place for it. Of course, I suppose I
    could use it for reading material in the loo or at least use the pages to wipe my arse."

    Lara walked over to the bed, rubber-encased feet padding silently across the floor, and mounted
    the tied-up Raider, nestling her bottom on top of and into his groin, rubbing it teasingly.

    "Mmmm. You look so YUMMY tied up and helpless," she purred as she leaned over with her arms
    folded on his chest, her face inches from his. I could just eat you all up."

    A contented purr tickled Alex's ears as his captor ran a finger up and down his cheek.

    "Alexander Jonathan West, whatever are we going to do with you? I thought we had something.
    I give you my love and next thing I know, you're shacking up with another bimbo as well as
    taking credit for digs I have discovered and artifacts I have found. I said time and time again
    that if you cross me, we can't remain friends. Yet, you insist on doing just that. Why?"

    Lara stroked Alex's cheek before slapping it hard as the tied up Raider gave a muffled bark
    of shock and hurt. Her eyes blazed and her voice was ice.

    "Tell me, Alex. What exactly am I to you? What? Do I mean something to you? Did our
    time together have any significance or am I just another fucktoy to you? Just some pretty
    plaything to amuse yourself with and discard when you are bored?"

    Lara regarded the bound Raider for a moment as she mentally reminisced about seeing his
    novel A RAIDER'S LIFE in the bookstore and scanning through it, growing angrier and angrier
    as it told of Alex's rise to glory in prominence in the Archeology world and all the sites he
    explored and artifacts he discovered. Of course, he did not mention that a lot of the sites
    Lara had visited and that his "discoveries" were actually stolen and sold to the highest
    buyer, thus affording him a rather comfortable living. What galled Lara the most was seeing
    Alex on ARCHEOLOGY KIDS, a program to encourage future explorers, lying about his finds.

    "Tell me, Alex," Lara frostily demanded. "How stupid do you think people are? Do you really
    think they buy this BULLSHIT about you being the second coming of Indiana Jones? And lying
    to those children when they look up to you is bloody unspeakable! Now you write that you have
    visited the temple of Princess Xi Laulin and have discovered her funeral mask. We know I found
    it and you stole it from my hotel room in Munich. Tell me, what is Simon Powell paying you to
    give it to him?

    Alex struggled as his pleas and arguments were unreadable due to the duct tape. Lara sat there,
    then a cruel smile curved her lips as she began to slowly and deliberately rub her bottom against
    Alex's groin, cooing in sadistic delight while he let out a soft moan. Back and forth and back and
    forth, the rubber glided against the boxer's material and what lay beneath.

    "Of course," Lara purred as she continued to torture and tease said area, "if you told me where the
    mask is and how much Powell is paying you, I might forgive you. Also, you could write a retraction
    saying the book is complete bollocks as well as apologize for lying to your adoring public."

    Alex angrily protested that he would do no such thing. Lara smiled as she patted cheek and kissed
    it. She then removed a large commando-style knife from her ever-present gunbelt and cut the
    ropes tied around the other Raider's right hand. She held it as she placed it on his chest.

    "Now, I am leaving the knife for you to release yourself, but not until I leave. I am trusting you,
    though God knows why. Just so you know I still haven't forgiven you for the prayer wheels, but I
    am over them. You are a good man, Alex. I just wish you would make more intelligent decisions
    that don't involve your getting paid and fuck all to everyone else."

    Lara released Alex's hand and got off the bed. She walked to the door with her eyes locked onto
    the other Raider. A soft smile decorated her aristocratic features.

    "The chapter about me was very flattering," she purred. "I suppose we do have a like/hate
    relationship. Good night, Alex. I'll see you around."

    She blew him a kiss and left. Alex waited a few minutes before cutting himself free, cursing
    and vowing revenge for his humiliation. He ran into the den and stopped short, seeing the
    safe empty. As he walked over, he saw a note and a check for fifteen million dollars. More
    than Powell paid to have him acquire the mask. Alex didn't even bother with the note, as
    he knew that Lara must have stolen the mask back from him. He simply punched a number
    on his cellphone and left a message on Powell's voicemail before going back to bed.

    "Enjoy your little laugh, Croft," he smiled to himself, "but remember. Payback's a bitch."


    ta-daa. a little something for those who might fantasize such an evening. comments are
    welcome. enjoy. :sun: :grins

    hey Cat, :wave2:

    no, I wasn't delving into the idea and picking it apart. just a neutral observation. I still think she is cool. as for the
    twist, as someone asked, I'm afraid you're going to have to go to YOUTUBE and watch it. very entertaining. as for
    the name "Dopplehoe", I think it's cute in a somewhat sexist manner. of course, I'd probably use "twin" or "double"
    or "clone" or even "Lara" in my tales. anyway, just an observation not a complaint. :sun:

    hey all, :wave2:

    how are we doing? I was watching BENEATH THE ASHES on YOUTUBE. pretty interesting, especially the little twist
    with Ms. Dopplehoe. anyhoo, I was thinking that she really is not because doppleganger basically means "twin", right?
    and one can tell that Dopplehoe won't be confused with Lara. Lara's hair is a lovely chestnut brown and DH's is a wine
    red. Lara's eyes are a chocolate brown, DH's a golden yellow. this is just an observation, but if Natla wanted to really
    screw with Lara's mind, she would make a clone that looks and behaves exactly like Lara. any thoughts? :grins

    hey, :wave2:

    so I take it we're probably talking Angelina Jolie catching Brad with Jennifer Aniston. something along those
    lines, right? I look forward to seeing what happens next. :sun:

    hey Cat, :wave2:

    my God. the clone speaks! :grins and I started a forum on another site wondering why she was mute. anyway,
    the story is very well done and the only question I have is what voice do you have in mind. is it Lara's voice
    or another? anyway, well-written and very intriguing. I look forward to what happens next. :sun:

    hey, Cat :wave2:

    I left a message at anyhoo, that is a very intriguing opening and I think you should write
    to XBOX and EIDOS and ask/demand that they use your story as part of LARA'S SHADOW. I am looking forward to
    more so please keep up the wonderful work. :grins :thumbs: